3ed

"Yea, it was so removed from the city. And there was a pond nearby where we used to go and bathe, me, mom and dad. Yea..." he closed his eyes, smiled insanely with the idea and thought about the pup playing in it's surroundings exploring. He opened his eyes and tried to confirm his ideas. He smiled again.

The man was not stupid. He was able to register a lot of his own consciousness. He had registered that the pup was not learned and was learning to deal in it's own surroundings. It had not yet learnt to use it's own paw properly so that the flower which it was trying to pluck out kept slipping out of it's paw. The moment the flower slipped out the pup which was on it's hind legs, it's body partially supported by the stem of the plant, would come off the plant and sit below staring at the flower only to wait just a few seconds, probably formulating another strategy to pluck the flower. There was a bee by the side which kept coming close to the flower. The little pup, which was initially engaged with the flower, would, when suddenly upon spotting the bee, start to run after it and occasionally jump up to catch it with its paws. After an initial chase, in which the pup would take a few turns around wherever it stood (probably confused as to where the bee had suddenly disappeared and then after suddenly spotting it for a second behind its shoulder get up again), the bee would fly ahead just above the pup's head, in reach of its snout perhaps. It would ascend by a small amount at which the pup would stop and stand for a moment looking it, it tail still wagging, but slowing a little. After a few seconds of staring the pup would sit and stare. After about a minute, the it would go back to the flower and start playing with the flower again. It was clearly visible that the pup was very excited at that moment.

The man was observing this. He smiled when he realized the contrast of his thinking with the dog's and the dog's obliviousness to his thinking all this. "It would be probably but a couple of years and this dog will have it's own story to tell won't it? It would lose it's virginity and become a mother, with a love for her own pup which will" - he thought ahead with a further smile "forget her and desert her."

He took up a stone by the side of his arm where he was lying down. He had the sadistic impulse to give the pup another experience. So far, he thought, the pup was just learning by having fun. How would it be to throw a stone at it and make it experience pain as well? He smiled a bit more. But then he stopped. He realized one more thing.

He was not like any other man lying down at that old end with none other who looked like him. He was clever as has been mentioned before. He was conscious of his dislike for this malice of wanting to throw the stone at the dog, but was not able to suppress the malice. It was too strong an emotion and he knew that he was flowing away with it and would regret it. Not focussing on this part of his consciousness of predicting the self - hate this would give him, he allowed himself the indulgence of the sickness and sadism that precedes such actions and which results in them. He took a certain pride in knowing that at that moment, the difference between him and the other beggars like him was that they would not see destroyable beauty and life in what he was witnessing; it was thus obvious for them not to throw a stone at it for that purpose, although many of them were as self - destructive and helpless as he was.

The pup was playing at the other end again with the flower and had finally plucked it out. It was now trying to separate the petals from the central part of the flower by putting one paw as a weight on the central part and pulling on the petal with the other front paw. The petal tore. The pup looked at it and stared. It went over to another petal and started the same thing.

The man was starting continuously. He was not yet properly decided on throwing the stone at the pup but he had already started the action on an instantaneous caprice and gave in to the action and did not think when he finally threw the stone.

The stone hit the pup's rear and it yelped loudly with a start, running away to quite a distance , turning around and searching for the source of the stone; it's stare mingled with fear, puzzlement, surprise and probably - if permitted to such low animals not capable of feeling and thinking like humans - shock as well.

The man looked at the dog. He felt that slight urge to cry but a second later he felt that he was already recovering. He kept staring at the dog.

He concluded that he enjoyed this episode pretty much, although he hated himself for it as well.